Grooming began in earnest for Kate Lucas Savage at age sixteen, mostly by her high school softball coach, Corey-an, an experience more difficult to stomach since Corey was thirty-two, married, and a popularly esteemed teacher. From private messages giving her more attention to the years of abuse and manipulation, Corey’s acts were ones of control.
Kate grew up playing soccer and softball in Canal Fulton, Ohio. Sports were her life, while home life was not easy. Her father, her coach, was someone who put pressure on her, criticizing every mistake over and over. The pressure to be perfect was always there for her, and then came Corey, acting like the adult who really understood her.
She remembers that it started with small things: following her on social media, complimentary texts, and offers for rides home. They were now talking almost every day, and one night Kate stayed over at Corey’s house. She remembers being provided alcohol and marijuana gummies. After that, it’s pretty blurry. The next day, Corey said they were in a relationship and that it had to be a secret.
Almost three years of abuse followed. Corey selected Kate’s friends, dictated who to talk to, and even persuaded her to pick a college to stay in the game and under his control. If Kate ever tried to pull away, Corey threatened to injure herself or tarnish Kate’s name.
Then, all of a sudden, the rumors began circulating among her fellow students in their senior year. The administration then investigated and shortly gave Corey a leave of absence, but he returned to teaching and coaching. They never called the cops or Child Protective Services. Nothing changed. Instead, the abuse became more camouflaged.
I still remember the day, years later, when we reconnected online, and she told me a little piece of this story. Even back then, she bore much shame that was not hers to bear. My tears flowed as I watched her speak publicly for the first time on the We’re All Insane podcast. I have seen how long it takes to name it when the abuser is a woman, and everybody around you calls it “a close friendship” or “a phase.”
The relationship ended when Kate went to college, but she retained the damage. Trust issues, anxiety, nightmares, everything followed her. For ten more years, after therapy and after establishing herself as a prosecutor, she felt ready to report Corey to the police.
The investigation started rolling, and once it began, it was rapid. In court evaluations, Corey expressed no remorse and maintained that it was a harmless friendship. In the end, Corey pleaded guilty to felony child endangerment and received the maximum sentence of three years in prison.
Kate wants people to know a few things. Women can be sexual predators, too. Abuse by a female coach or teacher is just as severe and damaging as abuse from a man. Schools still fail to report these cases as they should. And no matter how many years go by, it is never too late for survivors to come forward.
I have sat with friends who went through similar things with their female coaches, counselors, and teachers. The confusion is worse because society pretends it does not happen or that “it wasn’t that bad.” Kate’s story is proof that it is that bad and that there is more happening than people admit.
If you went through something like this, you are not alone. You don’t have to carry it forever. You may also be interested in: Ventura Mom Upset After Seeing Tyler Ebell Wearing School Badge Even After Serious Accusation
